Too young to be “fired”

May 21, 2012 § Leave a comment

Just a little while ago, I began watching the season finale of the Celebrity Apprentice, when a thought suddenly struck me.

What if I applied to be on the show?

I don’t mean the celebrity version; I am about as famous as a bag of bricks, but the traditional episodes. You know, with the normal people business moguls. Sure, maybe the show is targeted at a shrinking demographic of 49 year olds, but it could be worse, right?

image credit: tv series finale

Well, at least I wouldn’t be applying for this

The Apprentice has been on since I was legitimately about 10, and it was really nothing I aspired to. Back then, the most I really aspired to do was draw cat pictures and watch Rocko’s Modern Life. Which, I have to mention, was a fantastic show while it aired. that is to say, times have changed, and the world of marketing has opened itself up to me.

The Celebrity Apprentice would be a wonderful show to be a part of and to challenge myself, I thought.After all, I have already pursued the creation of my own business, Will Edit for Coffee, a college paper editing site, and am going to American Advertising Federation nationals in less than a month. Am I right?

So after making a declaration of overambitiousness to my parents, I hopped online to find and submit the casting application, only to promptly find I had made an utter fool of myself.

The casting age is 21. Another marketing dream thwarted by age, or thereof lack of. This ever-growing rejection list includes numerous internships at prestigious marketing companies, rude dismissals by marketing recruiters for being a freshman, and essentially putting myself out to a number of less-than interesting start-up companies. At least the start-ups wanted me.

So from these events I can deduce two possible realities for my future: either I will eventually lose my ambition from rejection, or by the time I am old enough to accept these offers, I will be a 60-year-old couch potato resigned to watching “Jeopardy” for the rest of my life.

image credit:

Self-portrait of Melanie, age 60

True story. But then, another thought. If  a book like Twilight can get published, maybe I can get a job offer from a decent company, or even be on a business show.

And I mean, this is Twilight we’re talking about.


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